I was always a bit afraid of them. Mention their name, and music enthusiasts all over the world instantly start burying them under boatloads of words of praise, with such devotion and determination it usually made me wonder - can these guys really be as good as everyone promises me? Does any artist (other than Fiona, obviously) really deserve such devout adoration?

Consequently, I stayed away from the band in question as if they had herpes. I just couldn’t believe all the pink ponies and rainbow stories with them in it, and in order to not be disappointed, I ignored them.

Well, as it turns out, I was wrong. Radiohead deserves all the praise they’re getting. Dear lord, these guys are good.

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I was a huge Guns N’ Roses fan, back in the day. In 7th grade, in 1988, I got introduced to G’n'R, and I just loved it. I swallowed up every song on Appetite for Destruction and Lies. Hunted down Live Like a Suicide. Found all their demos like “Crash Diet.” I stuck by them through Use Your Illusion I and II - got them both sight unseen on opening day. Saw them live in ‘92. I even bought The Spaghetti Incident?! in 1993.  As the next album delay began, my interest began to wane.  I went from superfan to fan to casual fan to indifferent to hating Axl’s winded comeback performance to casually interested to seeking out Chinese Democracy.  And now I have it.  I’ll spare you the reading: I’m a fan again.  

I could’ve told you well ahead of time how much this album was going to suck.  After all, it’s been 14 years in the making.  Axl has gone through several line up changes and at least 3 lead guitarists since Slash.  All of them have some appearance on the album, I’m told.  14 years of nonstop revision has got to lead to the inability to be objective.  And it’s gotta be overproduced as all hell as Axl does nonstop tweaking.    

So when I got my hands on the album and gave it a listen, I was surprised to find that it was actually… pretty damned good.  Read on for the full treatment.

The album starts with the title track, which, I have to say, is one of my least favorites. The good news is that it rocks.  It starts off with a long build, and when it kicks in, it has a nice rhythm, but sadly, the whole thing builds to an expected chorus that just never arrives.  It’s a decent track, but only that: decent.

Track 2 is Shackler’s Revenge, which many might recognize since it was included in Rock Band 2 (or Guitar Hero, one of those) pre-release.   This is another heavier song with a good rolling guitar line and a fun dancing hi-hat chorus.  It’s got Axl’s signature self-harmony in the verses and some creative overdubbing in the chorus, which is both memorable and catchy.  The main guitar line riff almost sounds like 1990’s Ozzy Osbourne (Zak Wylde era), because of the harmonics. 

Better, a several years-old track, was leaked long ago.  Although at first you might find it foreign, it’s a great song.   This song sounds like the most natural progression of Guns N’ Roses so far.  It has a very nice riff which serves as the chorus melody and overlaps the verses nicely too; good song writing.    Also, the band teams up to deliver well on this.  The drum line and the stringed instruments work very well on this to deliver a complete, seamless song.  This version is definitely better than any previous iteration.  

Track 4, Street of Dreams, starts like an Elton John song, but rapidly develops a very familiar GNR feel.   It has a nice Use Your Illusion II vibe, sounding quite a bit like Estranged, but ultimately really taking a place as the Yesterdays of this album.  The song used to be called “The Blues” in previous performances, and I suspect there’s a little bit of autobiography in it.  When Axl says, “What this means to me is more than I know you believe,” a part of me thinks maybe it’s his confession that he really wants us to love this album after he’s slaved over it so long. 

If The World, the fifth track, begins with an almost Middle Eastern flavor.  But it’s deceptive, because it actually mutates into a funky power ballad.  Again, it feels like a natural, more relevant Guns N’ Roses.  The drums and rhythm are really nicely recorded.  They have a very nice electronica feel, without getting cheesy, and yet, seem in place.  Good track.  

There Was a Time is, in my mind, straight outta the GNR songbook.  It feels like a cross between a song of Appetite and Use Your Illusion I.   The chorus is not nearly as melodic as I’d like, but the verses are really nicely done and it’s very typical Axl.  Ultimately, this song’s bridge makes up for the lack of melody, and it remains a solid, familiar GNR song.  

I like Catcher in the Rye, although, I can understand why many won’t.  This is not your typical GNR.  In fact, if it weren’t Axl singing it, it could almost be a pop song.  It’s a nice interlude, not bad, a touch out of place, but probably reflective of the fact that Axl isn’t the same songwriter that he was 20 year ago(!). 

We’re rocking again with Scraped, and I have to admit, I haven’t yet connected with this song.  I get it, I’ve heard it several times now, and other than the “ah-ah” Immigrant Song-ish section, I’m just not feeling it.  It kind of meanders around as a rock song.  

The next song is Riad N’ The Bedouins.  Admittedly, I don’t know the backstory here, but I’ve seen references to it being based on a Arabic or Moroccan story.  Interesting that the song contains the line “somewhere in time,” which is an Iron Maiden album, and the term Bedouin, whic, according to one Internet comment, “are a group of Arab nomads who were partly the inspiration for the Fremen in Frank Herbert’s novel Dune.”  Maiden did a song called “To Tame a Land,” which was all about Dune.  Either way, it’s a great song. 

The next song is Sorry, which is a very non-GNR sounding power ballad.  It sounds more like Seether or some other modern band.  But - you know what - it’s a great song.  I like the chorus especially, it’s immediately memorable, and it’s got great harmony.  Those familiar with metal might liken it to Anthrax’s Black Lodge in tone.

I.R.S. was also released on several pre-release leaked copies of Chinese Democracy.  I like it now as I did then, it’s definately GNR, definitely Axl, and definitely a typical GNR guitar line.  It’s one of my favorites on the album, but that may have to do with the fact that I’ve known the song for a few years now.  

Track 12 is Madagascar.  I hesitate to call it a power ballad, but it’s certainly a slower tempo rock song.  Decent, also present on previous leaked releases. 

Certainly, This I Love is a ballad.  It’s nice, the first half isn’t much for me, since there is no drum track, and therefore, it never gets the power it should have until about 3 and half minutes into the song, at which point there’s a nice guitar solo, and the song takes shape.  It’s got a good flavor, but not necessarily as memorable as other tracks.   

The album closes with Prostitute, which, like Catcher in the Rye, could be a pop song.  If this was performed by Hannah Montana, it would absolutely be standard pop fare.  I actually like the song well enough, but I recognize that it’s just metal-ed up pop.  

In the end, Chinese Democracy holds its own surprisingly well.  In fact, all of the things I would have expected did not come true.  The production is nice and not overdone.  The songs are clean and not overlayered or overly engineered.   The same old Axl is there, but the sound is oddly current feeling.  

If you liked GNR before this album - particularly if you liked the Use Your Illusion albums, I think you will be very satisfied with Chinese Democracy.  And while you might think this is really just an Axl solo album, it feels an awful lot like classic GNR.

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Thar she blows! Thar she blows! Thar she blows! The new A Camp single! The new A Camp single! Oh my god! I waited god knows how long for this!

Lyrically, “Stronger Than Jesus” is really typical Nina - it’s about love, but from an odd perspective. Musically, it seems like a departure from the dark and lonesome atmosphere of the “band’s” (it’s more or less regarded as Nina Persson’s solo work) title-less debut album, which was an odd mix of country music and abundant orchestras. The country doesn’t bear the overtone - it’s more the baseline, the bare metal skeleton of the sound that guides everything else, but never overpowers it. Combined with Nina’s seductive bedroom voice, it was an oddball album that won’t capture you in one go - you’ll need to give it some time. The debut album was met with very positive reviews, but gained little commercial success. Especially “Song For The Leftovers” and “The Bluest Eyes In Texas” are mind blowing pieces of art.

It does seem like this new album - as far as you can judge an album by just one song - will be another hard pill to swallow: you’ll be a bit turned off at first, but once you put the pill in your mouth and drink the water, there’s no way it’s going to get out.

Gosh, I wish Fiona, Nina, Alanis, and Shirley would come together one day and form the modern, female equivalent of Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young. They’d kick so much ass.

Fiona, Nina, Alanis & Shirley. Really has a nice ring to it.

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As has probably not gone unnoticed, I’m a bit of a Fiona Apple fan. In fact, I’m one of those Fiona Apple idiots, one of those people that belong to her core fan group, a group of people so obsessed with her work, her character, her being, that it sometimes scares me a little.

Listening to her art is still one of the most pleasurable past times for me. Listening to and watching interviews with her is one of the most entertaining things there is, because she isn’t media trained, and as such, comes across natural, unedited. Watching her perform is simply mindblowing - she’s not singing her songs, she’s engulfing herself in them, she’s reliving the tales told in the words, right there on stage, and you can taste it.

One of the controversial discussions among Fiona fans is which version of Extraordinary Machine is better - the leaked, unfinished Jon Brion version, or the actually released, finalised Elizondo record. Most of the people in the scary obsessed group of fans swear by the leaked Brion version.

I don’t.

A confession: I’ve never even heard it. Badum-tish.

The reason is simple. Fiona has made it clear that she wasn’t happy with the Brion version. It was too much Brion, and too little Fiona. Brion is an amazing producer, an amazing musician, and he did a great and outstanding job on Fiona’s When The Pawn, but for some reason, Fiona didn’t like the results when it came to Extraordinary Machine. She cancelled the project, and later on decided to start over, this time with producer Mike Elizondo.

This became the released version of Extraordinary Machine, the version that I proudly have in the prime position in my record collection as the limited-edition dual-disc version, which contains a DVD side with emotional and very cosy live material recorded at Club Largo.

Anyway, I have 100% confidence in Fiona. She knows what’s best for me, as one of her most devout fans and admirers. She said she didn’t like the Brion version, and recorded a new and apparently very different version of the album that she did like. And that’s enough reason for me to ignore the illegal bootleg release. I’ve never heard it, and I’m not going to either.

And I think it’s this blind faith in Fiona that makes the biggest and most devout Fiona fan in the world.

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Dear Beyonce,

If you were a boy, you’d be flipping burgers at Wendy’s because you wouldn’t have a hot body to sell.

Take care honey,

Thom

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Every so often, I’m going to post an album recommendation. I have lots of “favorite” albums, but I’m going to share a few that I find especially good. Today brings an album that really captures the flavor of rock in the early 1990s.

In the early 90s, Guns N’ Roses had successfully killed off hair metal in favor of accessible heavy metal. That changed when the Use Your Illusion albums came out - as “rock” more than metal - and rock softened up a little. Bands like Mr. Big and Firehouse were suddenly relevant. A little known Southern band who had been around since the mid-80s dropped into the scene with a fantastic album called “Fly Me Courageous.”

Fly Me Courageous features several great songs besides the title track which became a successful single, most notably “Let’s Go Dancing.”  Other songs such as “For You,” “Look What You’ve Done to Your Brother,” and “Around the Block Again” are really great songs that are a throwback to that period in rock music.  While it certainly won’t feel like current music, it will certainly prove to be a successful demonstration of just good, catchy song writing.        

 

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Thirteen years down the road, and this is still the best intro to a song ever made.

I’ve been a bad, bad girl
I’ve been careless with a delicate man
And it’s a sad, sad world
when a girl will break a boy just because she can

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I bought two new albums last Sunday. The first won’t surprise many who know my taste in music (women! Women! Women!). I bought Amy Macdonald’s successful debut album “This Is The Life”. The second one might be a bit of a puzzler to most of my friends - I bought Rihanna’s “Good Girl Gone Bad: Reloaded”. [...]
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There’s so much more to see I don’t believe this is how the world should be Just wanted to share.
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Unfortunately, having a baby around means that I often find myself watching shows such as “The Backyardigans”.  As someone who has, since I was very young, considered myself pretty in touch with music and appreciative of true musicians, I am strangely compelled by much of the music found in these shows.  For every ten terrible songs, there’s one or two good ones that are so catchy you’d never believe it.  But if you dig deep enough, you’ll find some interesting lyrics hidden within.  Lately, I’ve had several Backyardigans songs in my head, but one of them, the Alicia Keys’ backed “Almost Everything Is Boinga Here” has got me a little worried.  Let’s examine:     

Austin: Boinga’s a word we don’t understand.
Mommy Martian: Well, words are different in Martian Land.
Pablo: Well, we don’t know your language yet.
Austin: Maybe you could teach us?
Mommy Martian: Sure, you bet.
Baby Boinga: Boinga!

Mommy Martian: Almost everything is boinga here,
Just in case you hadn’t heard.
Almost everything is boinga here,
It’s the Martians’ favorite word.

Uniqua: Do you call these hands?
Mommy Martian: Nope, we call them boinga!
Austin: Do you use pots and pans?
Mommy Martian: Yup, we call them boinga!
Baby Boinga: Boinga!

Pablo: We wear hats on our heads.
Mommy Martian: Really? We wear boinga!
Uniqua: Do you guys sleep in beds?
Mommy Martian: Nope, we sleep in boinga!
Pablo: Hey!
Austin: That’s good.

Mommy Martian: Do your birds say boinga?
Uniqua: No, our birds say tweet!
Mommy Martian: Do your flowers smell boinga?
Pablo: No, they just smell sweet!
Mommy Martian: Do you walk on your boinga?
Austin: No, we walk on our feet!
Mommy Martian: Do you sit on your boinga?
Uniqua: No, we sit on our seat!

Baby Boinga: Boinga! Boinga!

Pablo: You certainly use that word a lot.
Mommy Martian: Well, it means a lot of things, so why not?
Austin: Is there anything boinga doesn’t mean?
Mommy Martian: Well maybe there is but not that I’ve seen.
Pablo, Uniqua, and Austin: Almost everything is boinga here.
Mommy Martian: We boinga all boinga long.
Baby Boinga: Boinga!

Pablo, Uniqua, and Austin: Almost everything is boinga here.
Mommy Martian: So we boinga this boinga song.
Baby Boinga: Boinga!
Pablo, Uniqua, and Austin:Boinga this boinga
Mommy Martian: Boinga!
Pablo, Uniqua, and Austin:Boinga this boinga
Mommy Martian: Boinga!
Pablo, Uniqua, and Austin:This boinga song!
Mommy Martian: Boinga!
Pablo, Uniqua, and Austin:Boinga this boinga
Mommy Martian: Boinga!
Pablo, Uniqua, and Austin: Boinga this boinga
Baby Boinga: Boinga! Boinga! Boinga!

Alright. So let’s take a closer look at few lines, shall we?  Let’s start with this one: “We boinga all boinga long.”  Aside from the fact that - I promise you - way too many dirty-minded people are going to interpret this as  ”we f#@% all night long,” partly because “boinga” sounds a lot like “boing,” which is colloquially used as a cleaner version of “screw,” it proves that the word “boinga” is both a noun and a verb.  Once we concede that Martians use “boinga” as a univeral verb and a universal noun, it contradicts earlier sentences.  

Shouldn’t “Do your birds say boinga?” be “Do your boinga say boinga?” Actually, given the verb, shouldn’t it be “Do your boinga boinga boinga?”   Shouldn’t that whole verse be mostly “boingas?”  In fact, why is the word “do” allowed? “Boinga your boinga boinga boinga” just doesn’t make a lot of sense.  Stupid Martians. 

Let’s assume that we can get over Mommy Martian’s arbitrary use of the word boinga as a replacement for some words but not others.  Why would Martians refer to Mars as “Martian Land?” Have you ever refered to our planet as “Earthling Land?” Of course, because it’s just weird. 

Also, the Martian Mommy seems awfully fluent in English, and yet, she doesn’t know what birds say or how flowers smell.  She can sing an impromptu song, but appears entirely unaware of the words “sweet,” “feet,” “seat,” or “tweet.”   

Also, do you find it a smidge naive that Austin and Pablo seem to believe that they are capable of learning the native language in “Martian Land” in the course of one 2 minute song?  …and do?

This is the line that kills me: “So we boinga this boinga song.”  Please! You can’t convince me that many young moms and dads don’t hear “So we sing this fuckin’ song.“ 

Who said childrens’ songs were boring?

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I once posted some rather prescient Rush lyrics.  Today, whilst listening to the 1975 album “Fly By Night,” I was struck by how applicable the lyrics to yet another Rush classic have become.  

Ten score years ago, defeat the kingly foe
A wondrous dream came into being
Tame the trackless waste, no virgin land left chaste
All shining eyes, but never seeing

Beneath the noble bird
Between the proudest words
Behind the beauty, cracks appear
Once with heads held high
They sang out to the sky
Why do their shadows bow in fear?

Watch the cities rise, another ship arrives
Earth’s melting pot and ever growing
Fantastic dreams come true, inventing something new
The greatest minds, and never knowing

The guns replace the plow, facades are tarnished now
The principles have been betrayed
The dreams’s gone stale, but still, let hope prevail
History’s debt won’t be repaid

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Back in high school, I had a friend (he’s still a friend, although we don’t see each other very often) who was quite intelligent - as in, cum laude university. This is one of those people who are always right, no matter the subject, no matter the state of intoxication. Except for this one time, like [...]
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All too often, pop culture deaths have a more profound effect than they should.  However, I was surprised when in January, I was more affected by the death of Heath Ledger than I expected to be.  I guess I felt as though Ledger was part of my “generation.”  Fast forward to today, and I’m really quite upset to see that Leroi Moore, saxophonist for the Dave Matthews Band, has passed away. It appears that there were complications from an ATV accident in June. He was 46.

This is a great loss for music in general, and while it might not be on par with the passing of Jerry Garcia or Kurt Cobain, I really think the Dave Matthews Band has an enormous following, and like The Grateful Dead, operate as a unit that will certainly be worse off without Moore’s unique style.  Not only was Moore the saxophonist for DMB, he also played a large role, we’re told, in helping Dave arrange his many songs.

In July of 1997,  I was fortunate enough to get to see Phish in Virginia Beach for their US tour opener.  We were so excited, not only because it was the tour opener, not only because they would end up opening the tour with 4 new-to-the-US songs, but also because it had rained torrentially and right before the show, and while we were all drenched, a fantastic rainbow enveloped us and everybody had to simply relax and enjoy the seemingly cosmic event.

Imagine our surprise when, not long into the second set, Mr Leroi Moore joined Phish on stage for solid renditions of Theme From the Bottom and Funky Bitch.

Leroi Moor will be missed, but I suspect his legacy will live on for some time via the Dave Matthews Band.

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While a lot of people seem to think that Fiona and Alanis are two apples fallen from the same tree, this is decidedly not the case. The two are like night and day, producing art with the only shared characteristic that of being music. Musically, the difference is pretty drop-dead obvious.

Lyrically, the difference might be a lot less obvious to casual listeners. I knew the difference was there, I knew they write lyrics that are really unique and not at all alike - I just never knew how to put it into words.

Well, I do now.

Alanis puts into words how everyone feels. Fiona puts into words how Fiona feels.

And, well, uhm, Fiona doesn’t really resemble ‘everyone’. You can easily identify with Alanis’ words, but you can never really identify with Fiona’s words. And that’s the major difference, and also the reason why lyrically, I prefer Fiona: she goes her own way, and she writes about how she feels, in her own unique way. Alanis writes about her own feelings too, but she writes in such a way that her listeners can identify with her - and she makes concessions in the process.

Fiona doesn’t do concessions. Fiona is all Fiona, all the time. And that’s why I love her so much.

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“I don’t know who you’re talking to with such fcuking disrespect.” That’s Alanis’ message to her ex-fiance, actor Ryan Reynolds, from the song “Straitjacket” on her new album. “Flavors Of Entanglement” has completely blown my socks off - there are no other words for it.

So-Called Chaos left me with a bitter after taste - it didn’t deliver, it wasn’t Alanis at her best. The album had its moments, but it was by far the weakest so far, which left me with the scary realisation that for all we knew, Alanis might have lost the magic touch.

But Flavors Of Entanglement, which she co-produced with Bjork and Madonna producer Guy Sigsworth, is nothing short of a rebirth. It combines all that was good about her masterpiece Supposed Former Infatuation Junkie with the musical complexity of Feast On Scraps, with a sauce of the electricity found on Madonna’s Ray Of Light - topped off with the franticness of Bjork’s Volta and Post.

The album opener, “Citizen Of The Planet” is a musical revelation, the chorus will make your heart pounding. The already mentioned Straitjacket should make Scarlet Johansson think twice about her relationship with Reynolds - “I swear you won’t be happy ’til I’m bound in a straitjacket.” It’s not all up-tempo and anger, as the soft melancholy of Not As We and Torch shows the other side of Alanis: touching, emotional, extremely clever.

But most of all, I’m happy Alanis is - again - confident enough to unleash her most powerful weapon: her unrivalled, uncontrollable voice. It weeps, it lashes out, it comforts, it unsettles. I don’t care about all the music, the instruments, the artwork - I’m just happy her voice is back, and I can again enjoy her one-of-a-kind sounds.

I was wrong to doubt her. Flavors Of Entanglement is a masterpiece, no doubt about it. It’s right up there with Supposed Former Infatuation Junkie. Absolute brilliance.

Definitely recommended.

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